Aug102010
Our
confidences in you need not clashThere is...
Our
confidences in you need not clashThere is something
soothing in the idea that we have the same friend, and that
whatever unhappy differences of opinion may exist between us, we
are united in our love of youIt will be a comfort to me to tell you
how things now are, and what are my present plans, if plans I can be
said to haveI have been returned since SaturdayI was three weeks
in London, and saw her (for London) very oftenI had every attention
from the Frasers that could be reasonably expectedI dare say I
was not reasonable in carrying with me hopes of an intercourse at
all like that of MansfieldIt was her manner, however, rather than
any unfrequency of meetingHad she been different when I did see
her, I should have made no complaint, but from the very first she
369
Jane Austen
was altered: my first reception was so unlike what I had hoped, that
I had almost resolved on leaving London again directlyI need not
particulariseYou know the weak side of her character, and may
imagine the sentiments and expressions which were chanel j 12 torturing me
She was in high spirits, and surrounded by those who were giving
all the support of their own bad sense to her too lively mindShe is a cold-hearted, vain woman, who has
married entirely from convenience, and though evidently unhappy
in her marriage, places her disappointment not to faults of judgment,
or temper, or disproportion of age, but to her being, after all,
less affluent than many of her acquaintance, especially than her sister,
Lady Stornaway, and is the determined supporter of everything
mercenary and ambitious, provided it be only mercenary and ambitious
enoughI look upon her intimacy with those two sisters as the
greatest misfortune of her life and mineThey have been leading
her astray for yearsCould she be detached from them!?and sometimes
I do not despair of it, for the affection appears to me principally
on their sideThey are very fond of her; but I am sure she does
not love them as she loves youWhen I think of her great attachment
to you, indeed, and the whole of her judicious, upright conduct
as a sister, she vintage chanel jewelry appears a very different creature, capable of everything
noble, and I am ready to blame myself for a too harsh
construction of a playful mannerI cannot give her up, FannyShe
is the only woman in the world whom I could ever think of as a
wifeIf I did not believe that she had some regard for me, of course
I should not say this, but I do believe itI am convinced that she is
not without a decided preferenceI have no jealousy of any individual
It is the influence of the fashionable world altogether that I
am jealous ofIt is the habits of wealth that I fearHer ideas are not
higher than her own fortune may warrant, but they are beyond what
our incomes united could authoriseThere is comfort, however, even
hereI could better bear to lose her because not rich enough, than
because of my professionThat would only prove her affection not
equal to sacrifices, which, in fact, I am scarcely justified in asking;
and, if I am refused, that, I think, will be the honest motiveHer
prejudices, I trust, are not so strong as they wereYou have my
thoughts borse louis vuitton exactly as they arise, my dear Fanny; perhaps they are some370
Mansfield Park
times contradictory, but it will not be a less faithful picture of my
mindHaving once begun, it is a pleasure to me to tell you all I feel
I cannot give her upConnected as we already are, and, I hope, are
to be, to give up Mary Crawford would be to give up the society of
some of those most dear to me; to banish myself from the very
houses and friends whom, under any other distress, I should turn to
for consolationThe loss of Mary I must consider as comprehending
the loss of Crawford and of FannyWere it a decided thing, an
actual refusal, I hope I should know how to bear it, and how to
endeavour to weaken her hold on my heart, and in the course of a
few years?but I am writing nonsenseWere I refused, I must bear
it; and till I am, I can never cease to try for her
The only question is how? What may be the likeliest means? I have
sometimes thought of going to London again after Easter, and sometimes
resolved on doing nothing till she returns to MansfieldEven
now, balenciaga motorcycle handbags she speaks with pleasure of being in Mansfield in June; but
June is at a great distance, and I believe I shall write to herI have
nearly determined on explaining myself by letterTo be at an early
certainty is a material objectMy present state is miserably irksome
Considering everything, I think a letter will be decidedly the best
method of explanationI shall be able to write much that I could
not say, and shall be giving her time for reflection before she resolves
on her answer, and I am less afraid of the result of reflection
than of an immediate hasty impulse; I think I amMy greatest danger
would lie in her consulting MrsFraser, and I at a distance unable
to help my own causeA letter exposes to all the evil of consultation,
and where the mind is anything short of perfect decision, an
adviser may, in an unlucky moment, lead it to do what it may afterwards
regretI must think this matter over a littleThis long letter,
full of my own concerns alone, will be enough to tire even the friendship
of a FannyThe last time I saw Crawford was at omega geneve automatic
confidences in you need not clashThere is something
soothing in the idea that we have the same friend, and that
whatever unhappy differences of opinion may exist between us, we
are united in our love of youIt will be a comfort to me to tell you
how things now are, and what are my present plans, if plans I can be
said to haveI have been returned since SaturdayI was three weeks
in London, and saw her (for London) very oftenI had every attention
from the Frasers that could be reasonably expectedI dare say I
was not reasonable in carrying with me hopes of an intercourse at
all like that of MansfieldIt was her manner, however, rather than
any unfrequency of meetingHad she been different when I did see
her, I should have made no complaint, but from the very first she
369
Jane Austen
was altered: my first reception was so unlike what I had hoped, that
I had almost resolved on leaving London again directlyI need not
particulariseYou know the weak side of her character, and may
imagine the sentiments and expressions which were chanel j 12 torturing me
She was in high spirits, and surrounded by those who were giving
all the support of their own bad sense to her too lively mindShe is a cold-hearted, vain woman, who has
married entirely from convenience, and though evidently unhappy
in her marriage, places her disappointment not to faults of judgment,
or temper, or disproportion of age, but to her being, after all,
less affluent than many of her acquaintance, especially than her sister,
Lady Stornaway, and is the determined supporter of everything
mercenary and ambitious, provided it be only mercenary and ambitious
enoughI look upon her intimacy with those two sisters as the
greatest misfortune of her life and mineThey have been leading
her astray for yearsCould she be detached from them!?and sometimes
I do not despair of it, for the affection appears to me principally
on their sideThey are very fond of her; but I am sure she does
not love them as she loves youWhen I think of her great attachment
to you, indeed, and the whole of her judicious, upright conduct
as a sister, she vintage chanel jewelry appears a very different creature, capable of everything
noble, and I am ready to blame myself for a too harsh
construction of a playful mannerI cannot give her up, FannyShe
is the only woman in the world whom I could ever think of as a
wifeIf I did not believe that she had some regard for me, of course
I should not say this, but I do believe itI am convinced that she is
not without a decided preferenceI have no jealousy of any individual
It is the influence of the fashionable world altogether that I
am jealous ofIt is the habits of wealth that I fearHer ideas are not
higher than her own fortune may warrant, but they are beyond what
our incomes united could authoriseThere is comfort, however, even
hereI could better bear to lose her because not rich enough, than
because of my professionThat would only prove her affection not
equal to sacrifices, which, in fact, I am scarcely justified in asking;
and, if I am refused, that, I think, will be the honest motiveHer
prejudices, I trust, are not so strong as they wereYou have my
thoughts borse louis vuitton exactly as they arise, my dear Fanny; perhaps they are some370
Mansfield Park
times contradictory, but it will not be a less faithful picture of my
mindHaving once begun, it is a pleasure to me to tell you all I feel
I cannot give her upConnected as we already are, and, I hope, are
to be, to give up Mary Crawford would be to give up the society of
some of those most dear to me; to banish myself from the very
houses and friends whom, under any other distress, I should turn to
for consolationThe loss of Mary I must consider as comprehending
the loss of Crawford and of FannyWere it a decided thing, an
actual refusal, I hope I should know how to bear it, and how to
endeavour to weaken her hold on my heart, and in the course of a
few years?but I am writing nonsenseWere I refused, I must bear
it; and till I am, I can never cease to try for her
The only question is how? What may be the likeliest means? I have
sometimes thought of going to London again after Easter, and sometimes
resolved on doing nothing till she returns to MansfieldEven
now, balenciaga motorcycle handbags she speaks with pleasure of being in Mansfield in June; but
June is at a great distance, and I believe I shall write to herI have
nearly determined on explaining myself by letterTo be at an early
certainty is a material objectMy present state is miserably irksome
Considering everything, I think a letter will be decidedly the best
method of explanationI shall be able to write much that I could
not say, and shall be giving her time for reflection before she resolves
on her answer, and I am less afraid of the result of reflection
than of an immediate hasty impulse; I think I amMy greatest danger
would lie in her consulting MrsFraser, and I at a distance unable
to help my own causeA letter exposes to all the evil of consultation,
and where the mind is anything short of perfect decision, an
adviser may, in an unlucky moment, lead it to do what it may afterwards
regretI must think this matter over a littleThis long letter,
full of my own concerns alone, will be enough to tire even the friendship
of a FannyThe last time I saw Crawford was at omega geneve automatic
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